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The 2008 Presidential elections promise to be very exciting. I know this because everyone is talking about it – pundits, bloggers, even people on the street (well, standing on line at Starbucks). The high-octane buzz is a byproduct of the campaign’s early start – I mean, really early, like Christmas decorations by July 4th early. 
I’m worried that like every caffeine rush, this one will result in a crash well before election day, in which case we’ll have an even lower voter turnout, if such a thing is possible. On the other hand, it gives us something else to focus on besides the current sorry state of affairs – always a good thing.
Besides, there are some genuine thrills associated with this campaign in that we have all sorts of “firsts” among candidates: the first woman (and first ex-First Lady), the first African-American (okay, half African), the first Republican Mormon, the first ex-prisoner of war and the first Hispanic (okay, half Hispanic). We have other firsts: the first candidate with three marriages, the first candidate who went from politics to acting and back to politics, the first candidate to have more books written about her than by her. Kind of boggles the mind.
The other day, I was thinking about running for President. I don’t have any experience to speak of but I have a number of constituencies to whom I could appeal, especially if we think outside the box here. I could be the aches and pains candidate. It sounds better than the arthritis candidate and broadens the appeal beyond the nursing home crowd. The baby-boomers might not want to admit it but we are getting pretty stiff and sore, partly because we’re growing older and in part because we refuse to grow up and stop running, jumping, skydiving, and beginning second families past fifty. In my case, genetics is a big part of my joint and tissue issue but we can play that down and focus on my passion for, say, pickup basketball. Since I will likely be a candidate for multiple joint replacements in the future, we’d pull in the bionic vote, not to mention orthopedic surgeons.
Let’s not forget I’m also an FSHH – female single head of a household. Granted, the household consists of one (plus my dog) but it’s still a household, complete with bills, taxes and the odd contractor. A recent study showed that 51% of U.S. households are headed by women. It’s true the study included fifteen-year-old girls, who can’t vote, but as they apparently head households, maybe they have enough clout to influence their parents or their older siblings.
I know I have to get the youth vote and I’m on it. Last week, I made a video to post to YouTube. Actually, it’s a cell phone recording of my dog chasing a ball around the living room while I’m going on and on about something or other in the background. It may not represent me at my best.
I’ve been toying with the idea of a “purple party” for some time. I like the way red and blue combine – not for political or philosophical reasons but because purple looks good on me. It’s also a soothing and historically noble color, which should appeal to those of royal lineage, those who believe they are descended from royal lineage, and those who just act like king of the hill, queen bees or spoiled princesses. The Purple party could also appeal to those who like the color purple…or those who liked “The Color Purple,” the book or the movie or musical …or, come to think about it, Oprah Winfrey. Whoa! Talk about widespread appeal!
© 2007 by Nikki Stern
